Relationships

Different perspectivesI recall my first job other than working with my father.  I was a service station attendant at Len’s Mobil in Festus at the age of 16.  Prior to that, I had learned to work on cars by helping my dad in his business, but Len taught me some valuable lessons that have remained with me for 46-years.

As I prepared to drain the oil on a customer’s car, I grabbed a crescent wrench to remove the drain plug from the oil pan.  Len noticed my choice of tools and promptly chastised me for using an adjustable wrench.  “Always use the proper tool for the job” he said, and handed me a ¾” box wrench to remove the plug.

In today’s hustle bustle world, where everyone is scrambling to get through the day, I’m wondering… How are your relationships going? 

What tools are you using to communicate with those in your circle of influence?

I recently read a book entitled “Emotional Contagion” by Elaine Hatfield, John T. Cacioppo, and Richard L. Rapson in which the authors discussed ways emotion affects our communication.  The problem I see is that text messages, tweets, and emails convey little if any emotion.  We use the same tool that was created for information to bridge the communication gaps in our society and wonder why we’re having problems with our relationships.

Michael Maher, in his book “The Seven Levels of Communication,” describes texts, tweets, and emails as electronic communication and places them in the informational zone.  To achieve effective influential communication, Michael suggests phone calls, events, and one-on-one face-to-face communication.

So again I ask, what tools are you using, and how are they working for you?

If your relationships are in need of an adjustment, perhaps your method of communication is in need of adjustment.  Finding the proper tool begins with acknowledging that there is a problem that needs to be addressed.  An age-old quote says it well: “You cannot change or heal what you don’t acknowledge.”  Contact Focal Quest Psychology Based Mentoring and Life Coaching for more information.